Sick and Twisted

by Dlove

I hate being sick. I’m a really active and social person, so when I’m sick, it’s a big blow to my lifestyle. Despite the fact that I should rest and quarantine myself from the world, I usually have a really difficult time doing so. Thus, it came as no surprise to me that I completely disregarded all warning signs of impending illness and instead continued to live my life at a breakneck pace. Although I knew it wasn’t a good idea, I simply wouldn’t allow any flu bug to stand in the way of the commitments I had made to myself and others before the weekend started.

There were some things that I chose to do, even though I knew they were bad ideas. It made no sense to go see the band that was playing at the bar around the corner from my apartment, but it was very easy to rationalize. The bar is, literally, less than two blocks away and there was no cover charge to see the best band (I think) in San Diego. How could I possibly pass that up? It seemed like an especially good idea after I’d already turned down the alternative: a trip to L.A. to go see an art show. In my mind, I was taking the less strenuous route. I was only going to be around the corner from my apartment, so I could leave at any time. My plan was to take it easy and listen to some tunes. What I didn’t take into account was the fact that the music was going to make me dance, my friends were going to be buying me beers and that I’d probably want to smoke some weed. None of those things, unfortunately, is good for stopping an impending flu bug. Still, I had a great time and tried to counteract any negative effects of the evening by eating tons of carrots and drinking orange juice like a fish….that drinks orange juice.

I’d had a difficult time sleeping the previous couple of nights due to my sinuses dripping into the back of my throat and constantly having to clear that mucus. I decided the best way to insure sleep was to take half of a valium pill I’d stowed away a couple of years ago for just such an occasion. I slept deeply and soundly that night but woke up in the morning to make another bad decision.

For the past four years, I’ve been meeting up with a group of guys in the park to play Ultimate Frisbee. It’s a great game and I look forward to playing every week. We have an email list and, at times, there is serious shit-talking that happens on that list. This particular week, I was talking an awful lot of shit. Some of the guys who hadn’t played in months (some over a year) had said they were going to come out and play. There was no way I wasn’t going to show up. You can’t talk all sorts of shit and then flake like a whiny baby sissy boy. The remnants of valium induced sleep fought to keep me in bed, but I persevered and got my ass up.

On a side note, it’s not like I’ve been completely and utterly sick the past few days. Yes, I’ve been congested and had a cough, but I haven’t felt too bad. So, yeah, I knew it was a bad idea to go and play Ultimate, but I didn’t feel so horrible that I couldn’t play at all. I made my way to the field and played one full game. By the end of that game, I was done for. There was no way I could play a second game. Instead, I watched from the sidelines and then headed home.

Next, came a barrage of commitments that I couldn’t possibly break. I had a wedding reception to attend, I had told a friend I’d help him move, I had a painting demonstration to do at an art event, and I’d told another gallery that I’d help them clean up after the art event. Basically, there was a chunk of time between 2:00PM and 11:00PM that was completely booked with activities other people were counting on me to perform. I didn’t want to let anyone down and I did them all. After the last activity, however, I had bad idea number three and continued to hang out with friends until 2:00AM. This wouldn’t have been such a bad thing if I’d been able to sleep in Sunday morning, but instead, I’d told a friend I’d help him move. Thankfully, my friend didn’t have a lot of stuff to move and the place he was moving to was only a couple of blocks away, but I still had to drag myself out of bed at 9:00AM to help him out.

When I finally got home a couple of hours later, my only plan was to jump back into bed and rest for the remainder of the day. This was exactly what I did. My slumber was only interrupted by concerned friends calling me to make sure I was alright and asking me if I needed anything. If there was a silver lining to my sickness, these calls were it. Yes, I’m still sick (although I seem to be on the mend), and yes, I might already be over this flu or cold or whatever had I not done all of the things that I did this past weekend. Friends would have understood if I’d told them I was sick and there wasn’t anyway I could help them out. I could’ve missed the wedding reception and my painting demonstration. I’ve already mentioned the few strenuous activities that I should’ve probably avoided but didn’t.

It might’ve been smarter to sequester myself to my bedroom this weekend, but I’m glad I didn’t. Those calls I got from concerned friends today are a direct result of the consideration I give to those friends and their projects. If someone needs help moving or has an art project or needs to talk or whatever, they know they can count on me to be there for them. On a day like today, I know I can count on them too. And I don’t even have to ask. I feel truly blessed.

Physically, I can’t honestly say that I’m feeling better, but in other ways, I feel fucking great! Oh, and I played one helluva good Ultimate game, enjoyed the band immensely and had a blast hanging with friends after the art event. Some things are good for the body, others are good for the soul.